Have you recently been thinking about making a career change? Perhaps you’ve been thinking about becoming pregnant? Maybe you would like to ask someone out who you have liked for a very long time? Fear can interfere with any life goal regardless of age, situation, and strength of desire for the goal.
You have been home with your new baby for the last few months. Your primary job has been that of caretaker; changing diapers, warming bottles, doing laundry, and so much more. The time has come to return to your previous job and you may wonder how you are supposed to make room for both these positions: parent and professional.
With the growing popularity of yoga and meditation in the western world, there has been an increased body of scientific research looking into these practices. There is great support for yoga and meditation as efficacious complementary treatments for hypertension, diabetes, cancer, cholesterol regulation, alcoholism, anxiety disorders, pain control, and obesity (Taylor, 1997).
You told yourself that the sleepless nights that come with being the parent of an infant would be over soon. You reminded yourself that when your infant acquired language there would be less crying and less frustration. Maybe you looked forward to taking your little one to preschool and playdates. When you're a first time parent, and even sometimes when you're and second or a third time parent, you can fantasize about the toddler years in an idealized manner.
Have you ever noticed how much easier it is to show compassion towards others than it is to give that to yourself? Do you find that you are quick to be frustrated with yourself when experiencing physical symptoms of an illness, rather than be compassionate towards yourself? Are you asking yourself right now, "what does self-compassion towards oneself when living with chronic illness even look like?"
Do you find yourself constantly arguing with your partner? Do you wonder why you can not just let the disagreement go and move forward? Do you feel the need to be right with your partner no matter how inconsequential being right is? If you answered yes to these questions then you may be stuck in a power struggle.
Do you live with a chronic illness and find yourself wondering if others who live with illness experience similar feelings to you? Do you find yourself wondering if you are overreacting or whether your feelings are valid? Do others who do not live with illness oftentimes not quite understand why you may be having the feelings that you are having?
It is oftentimes easier to become defensive during conflict in a relationship than it is to be vulnerable. This is NOT A SURPRISE! Typically one or both partners are already feeling hurt, hence the conflict, and the idea of further exposing oneself may seem self-destructive. So people default to defensiveness, which serves to create a protective wall around oneself and which prevents oneself from looking at their own contribution to the conflict.
Quite often I hear about disappointments in the workplace, such as not getting an expected promotion, not feeling that one's requests are being taken seriously, and not feeling as if one's ideas are being heard. Oftentimes these disappointments are not due to incompetence but rather to a lack of assertiveness and follow through.
Are you a first time father? If you are, then you may likely be experiencing a kaleidoscope of emotions. Sure you are probably thrilled that you have a beautiful new baby in your life, whom you love enormously. However, there could be a number of other emotions that you are experiencing that may feel like things that are "not ok" to talk about.
You just found out that someone you care about has just received a medical diagnosis and you don't know what to say. You are not alone. This is a common feeling and it is ok to not always know what to do or say. What is important is to try to not react in speech or action without thinking sensitively first.
The loss of a loved one is never an easy situation to process. There can be so many emotions present; emotions about the person who's passed, as well as emotions about one's own life. One may find themselves feeling very positively about the person who has passed away or perhaps angry at the person for leaving life, among other feelings
I often find myself wondering if people who do not live with a chronic illness are aware of how often those living with a chronic condition tend to blame themselves and feel shame for things that are really out of their control. It is my inclination to believe that most people do not think about the intensity and frequency of self-blame, guilt, and shame that people living with chronic illnesses may inflict on themselves. These experiences of blame, guilt, and shame can be quite emotionally painful and can oftentimes result in the person doing things that are not in his or her best interest in order to not feel painful feelings.
When living with chronic pain or chronic illness long enough, at times some people can start to believe that their discomfort is normal, until a moment comes and they are reminded that in fact it is not. Many people who live with chronic pain and illness may quickly understand what I am referring to... those moments when you look around and realize that nobody else in the room is experiencing the pain that you are. This may feel obvious to some; however, pain and discomfort may have become the new normal for many people living with pain. It is always or usually there, and some people may have even forgotten what it is like to live without it.